Communication is the Cornerstone of a Relationship

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Communicating with your partner is what makes a foundation for the happy relationship most couples strive for. This is, often overlooked however when people assess aspects of their relationship that they feel need attention.

Many couples end their relationships because they can't find an understanding. This lack of communication leads to fights, anger and resentment which in most average relationships can be resolved through an open dialog. You can prevent communication problems in your relationships by practicing some of the following tips. If you can apply some of these ideas you will be given the chance to avoid communication problems with your partner. It's amazing how small things can help, to be attentive and listen, or notice something good in the other person, all of which can improve your relationship.

Relationships in general can be difficult.

Communication is very cornerstone in the relationship; but it cannot betaken lightly, if so, without realizing its importance which lies in the fact that it helps us to grow we will neglect a central element that all successful couples share.

Many couples end their relationships because they can't find an understanding with their partner. This lack of communication then leads to those common three problems many list in therapy: fights, anger and resentment. Problems due to lack of communication are the result of:

  • A lot of talk, but not a lot of listening;
  • Use of indirect communication that does not make a clear point;
  • Showing a defensive attitude like being aggressive;
  • Dishonesty.

You can prevent communication problems in your relationships by practicing some of the following tips:

  1. When you meet with your partner, listen to what he or she has to say, think before you respond.
  2. Get to the point. There's no need to hide anything. Be open and clear so that misunderstood do not happen.
  3. Be honest and don't lie. The lie only leads to a lack of trust, doubt and resentment inside relationships.
  4. Try to be assertive. You need to understand the other person, but you must also express your feelings and ideas clearly. A relationship consists of two people so there must be two voices with a reasonable outcome.
  5. To improve communication in your relationship there must be openness on both sides. You can do this by sharing your experiences, the good and the bad. This will help both people relate on each other.
  6. When a discussion arises, avoid comments that will harm the other person. This includes generalizations and contempt. If you don't do this, you'll later feel sorry for what you said. It is also important that both exalt self-confidence and self-esteem.
  7. Find something good despite the negative. Let your partner have their own space by avoiding being a controller and insisting that they are always right.

If you can apply some of these ideas you may be able to avoid communication problems with your partner. It's amazing how small things we can do improve listening make a big difference when it comes to noticing something good in the other person.

Intimacy Comes From Within

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Many couples feel dissatisfied with their relationship on a sexual level and blame their partner; unable to think that there may be other reasons why they don't enjoy sex.

Today, it has become increasingly common to use copulation as a way to express other feelings, or as a way to solve other situations that have nothing to do with intercourse itself. Thus, the erotic relationship becomes a loaded experience, one with a lot of feelings; yet one stripped of its true and subsequent strength, which at the same time inevitably causes dissatisfaction, frustrations, and a sense of lacking.

Research into sexual health has brought forth example that spontaneity to become affectionate and show affection does not often exist between such couples. Thus, many people confuse making love their partner as the only way to expression in how they feel about each other. When this happens, needs are confused, and intimate moments lose passion and are no longer pleasant. Men are more prone to bundling sex together with the expression of love than do women. Today this is less acceptable, what was once one of the only culturally acceptable ways for a man to show affection to his wife is now a limitation.

It is true that sex can be a way of expressing affection, but it is also true that sex must be primarily pleasant for both parties and it is important that there are also other ways of giving and receiving affection that should not disappear in the couple's relationship. To avoid this confusion, it is important that they are clear about their emotional needs on the one hand, and on the other the sexual needs which are present in all healthy couples, without the former diminishing the latter.

So it's important to make it clear that it would be nice to kiss every night before bed, or a hug during the day. Hugging is important because it releases increase levels of oxytocin and reduces blood pressure. There is little question why it is universal in human communities. It is also recommended that the couple take at least 10 minutes every night to be nearby each other and cuddle with their partner without erotic intentions. Cuddle will fill the sentimental desire so that sexual desire can be enjoyed more broadly.

Another wrong reason why many couples make love with one another is to make peace in the household (makeup sex), to be distracted with something else, to combat stress, or compensate for the problems of everyday life. This situation causes a serious problem for many couples, because the person who uses it, that flees into sex, will get used to not facing life and hide in their moments of passion, so that they will soon stop being able to enjoy the moment, and in addition, the other person will never learn to support their partner if it is not a topic easily address which will prevent them from communicating and end up relating sex to help, which completely undermines its potential.

In order to resolve stressful situations in the home it is necessary to learn to open a dialog and to comment sincerely on one's feelings. It is also essential to say what is expected of sex, the needs that are present in the relationship and the gaps in other areas which are not replaced with sexual contact. Likewise, the couple must understand that the pleasure of both is important.

Likewise, some people will evade sex and avoid emotional interaction with their partner, always seeking intimate contact. Instead of talking about their problems they may want to have sex. In this circumstance, what needs to be made clear is that sex is not a substitute for emotions. It complements them and is undeniable that it brings the couple closer, but you must have communication at all levels for it to function, a relationship must include all aspects to be satisfying both erotically and emotionally.

Another common issue in an unhealthy relationship is that some people vent all their frustrations and anger in the sexual act. This is not healthy because you can hurt the couple in a very aggressive outburst, or you can stop enjoying sex, because it always reminds us of the problems of daily life. Alternate to this it might also become enjoyable which is a sign of deeper issues. To avoid all this, we must have true and sincere communication with our partner and also know how to discern when we are not in optimal condition to make love.

In those moments, an intimate conversation or hug may be more effective for the couple.

Anyway, as you can see, it's easier for a sexual relationship to deteriorate by the emotional burden of sex that is added over time, rather than time itself. When the couple manages to get rid of all those non-intimate reasons, they will immediately enjoy the experience more and will be able to experience new horizons.