Well Dressed

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A while ago I heard someone say (or I might have read it in some magazine (or saw it in a movie…)) that "you must dress for the job you want and not for the one you have".

Alright I thought, how do dress if you want to become Queen of England?

Seriously though, I think that the logic is pretty sound, but what if your budget doesn't for allow it? Let's remember that we don't have that dream job yet…so if you don't have it you can't exactly dress for it without hurting your bank account.

What if you don't have the figure to wear the kind of clothes you're supposed to wear? The problem was one that I wrestled with for a while. Because, let's admit, not all clothes are suitable for all jobs. And not all jobs allow you to wear the most suitable clothes. Beyond that I need to take my body type into consideration.

What if we weren't born with that innate grace to style our hair or combine pieces to make amazing styles? For example my hair never wants to cooperate, so in the end I chose to cut my hair shorter so I don't have to worry.

I am sure that both you and I, have a lot of clothes in the closet that we do not like for one reason or another. For example I have plenty I am not able to combine–purchased only because I was thinking that it will look great for work, or to go out, or to just be me! Don't you hate sales! Now instead of hanging on the store rack it is their, hanging on yours and taking up space.

And what have I decided? After taking an inventory on my closet craze I have decided to make a radical change, to it and to my style, and the way I buy. And I intend to apply the 3 simple rules to do it:

Reduce–Recycle–Reuse.

So I'm minimizing the purchases I make (both clothing and accessories) and reusing and recycling clothes I already had in the closet: lengthening dresses, shortening sleeves, adding DIY details to customize the accessories… I even started to make my own jewellery!! This has given me a better idea about accents, so that I am not wrong when it comes to combining an outfit.

Finally I hope that by sharing this with you, what I was able to learn, you are encouraged to follow a similar path (if, like I, you were lost), and help you get the most out of your closet. I am satisfied.

A big greeting and a big hug, thank you for stopping by and I hope you enjoyed my post.

Gestures in Non-Verbal Language

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Gestures, they say as much or more than is verbally said.

Here I leave you some very common nonverbal language gestures (body language), which we have almost all experienced in one form or another.

This very interesting one:

Fixing your hair: Many people feel that it is a feminine gesture; suggests discreet provocation, flirtation. But this can't be further from the truth, many researches agree that it is a sign of discomfort or uncertainty.

Adjusting your tie: It is a often perceived as the male equivalent to the previous one. The same message can manifest itself when the person fixes the crease on their trouser leg, smooths the flaps of their jacket, the handkerchief in the jacket pocket, etc.

Biting a lip: The same message above, with a certain shyness and nervousness showing through.

Caressing an unconsciously determined object: It is a gesture typical of individuals who have become distracted or disinterested.

A smile with a direct look: Suggests discreet provocation or a developed sense of self.

The classic top-down look: It depends on the situation, it can highlight the characteristic of a person who is assessing the situation or a person.

Open hands: It is a characteristic gesture of sincere people who is comfortable.

Clenched fist: The opposite reveals nervousness tension, the truth is hidden, and hostility.

Slumped shoulders: Suggests inability to cope with certain situations in life.

If the person sits with their legs together: Denotes a careful, orderly and careful personality.

If the individual crosses the leg at an angle: It is ambitious. Competitive. It's a rare attitude, often seen in athletes.

If the person sits on one leg: It can suggest a very conformist personality that is not easy to make decisions.

The woman who sits with her legs open: Reveals independence, a very defined concept of her image.

The tight cigarette holder: Denotes an intense, restless and erratic personality.

Blinking (constantly): Denotes total attention.

Looking at a person frequently: Shows affection.

Not looking at a person: Suggests rejection ("I'm not interested" or you don't share my sympathies).

A prolonged look with a serious face: Reveals curiosity in the beginning, can go as far as contempt.

When a man looks sideways (with some frequency): It is a sign of hypocrisy.

Touching a person too much (without equal reciprocation): Can mean; a degree of selfishness, control (or physical desire).

If man touches the genital area: It is a common gesture in some cultures and denotes a male reaffirmation (a these cultural structures expect reaffirmation in various ways).

The person walks very quickly: It suggests a dynamic, restless personality, eager to meet goals (either their own or from external sources) that have been set to be completed in a certain time.

If the individual walks with hesitant steps: Denotes a hesitant, erratic, insecure, shy and tired personality from the onslaughts received in their life.

Then we have other aspects of non-verbal language:

The forced smile is the one that becomes a kind of mask for our true feelings, it is the so-called professional smile (its greatest cultists are politicians, businessman actors).

Obsession with clothes and the way one dresses: Not only is an exhibitionist personality projected, but an independent rebellious character is demonstrated.

Playing with any object: It is clear that what this person is afflicted with nervousness, restlessness, anxiety, and they are actually trying to buy time and preparing to give an adequate response.

Look at the clock as you speak: Denotes haste and restlessness.

Look at the clock while someone else speaks: It's a rude gesture that reveals impatience.

The Magic of Love

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Love will always be present in our lives and hearts despite time, distance and situations. Living with the same partner for a long time can become stable and comfortable, and, as a result, can appear to have diminished the spark that made your relationship so special at first.

This isn't the case, however, realizing that it is there may have become less visible.

Here's some simple, fun and creative ideas to rekindle that magic which the two of you once shared. Chances are you've already thought about them. Don't be afraid to be cheesy, on the contrary they can give you incredible results. Sharing laughter is free and when done with the person you love an incredible way to bond an rekindle the spark.

Here are a few options:

Surprise: Send Them A Unique Gift

Get a piece of paper and some crayons. Draw a bright childish picture with a smiling sun and two figurines taken from your hands. Add tags with their two names by pointing to the figurines. Write 'I love you' inside a heart. Then get a big formal envelope. Place your drawing inside and type a formal label with the address of your partner's work, such as: "For the urgent and immediate attention of: Their Name, Their Address" Send it to your partner to receive in the middle of a hectic day.

Play: Connect With Your Inner Child (And Your Partner)

If you're walking by a park, visit the swings and playground equipment. Play on the beach. This usually brings back happy memories of his childhood.

Tenderness: A Massage With A Twist

Buy a small decorated cardboard box, a colored tissue paper sheet, some massage oil and a blank card. Put the massage oil in the box and write the following message on the card: "I know a great masseuse. For an appointment call: (Your phone number)"

Fond Memories: Dreams Of A Child

Contact your partner's family and ask if there was anything they always wanted when they were little. For example, if your wife always wanted a special doll, buy her one for her birthday. She will not only appreciate the gift, but also the fact that you were considerate enough to find out what she always wanted. You can do this for your husband, too.

The Moments: Look At The Clouds

Drive to a field, find a green hill, and lie back and look at the clouds.

Activities: Walk On The Beach

Draw the shape of a big heart in the sand. Sit inside your heart and caress your partner as you watch the sunset.

Togetherness: Organize A Picnic In Your Backyard Or Balcony On A Warm Summer Night

Place a picnic blanket on the ground and eat some snacks, chocolates and drink champagne together. Lie down on the blanket with your partner and look at the stars.

Caring: Show Your Partner That You Are Thankful

Leave a long-stemmed rose for your partner to find, with a note that says "Thank you for entering my life."

Intimacy: Keep Your Sex Life Alive

Probably the deepest way to rekindle romance in your relationship is to spice up your sex life. Surprise your partner with a small gift after making love, try a new position, learn to give a sensual massage to your partner (before or after), or simply spend your time looking into each other's eyes and stroking your bare skin before making love.

Many people underestimate the intimate and passionate effect that sex has on the couple. If you spice it up, you and your partner will probably do romantic things naturally. Why? Because making love passionately connects two people in a meaningful and inexplicable way that is not achieved with anything else.

Communication is the Cornerstone of a Relationship

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Communicating with your partner is what makes a foundation for the happy relationship most couples strive for. This is, often overlooked however when people assess aspects of their relationship that they feel need attention.

Many couples end their relationships because they can't find an understanding. This lack of communication leads to fights, anger and resentment which in most average relationships can be resolved through an open dialog. You can prevent communication problems in your relationships by practicing some of the following tips. If you can apply some of these ideas you will be given the chance to avoid communication problems with your partner. It's amazing how small things can help, to be attentive and listen, or notice something good in the other person, all of which can improve your relationship.

Relationships in general can be difficult.

Communication is very cornerstone in the relationship; but it cannot betaken lightly, if so, without realizing its importance which lies in the fact that it helps us to grow we will neglect a central element that all successful couples share.

Many couples end their relationships because they can't find an understanding with their partner. This lack of communication then leads to those common three problems many list in therapy: fights, anger and resentment. Problems due to lack of communication are the result of:

  • A lot of talk, but not a lot of listening;
  • Use of indirect communication that does not make a clear point;
  • Showing a defensive attitude like being aggressive;
  • Dishonesty.

You can prevent communication problems in your relationships by practicing some of the following tips:

  1. When you meet with your partner, listen to what he or she has to say, think before you respond.
  2. Get to the point. There's no need to hide anything. Be open and clear so that misunderstood do not happen.
  3. Be honest and don't lie. The lie only leads to a lack of trust, doubt and resentment inside relationships.
  4. Try to be assertive. You need to understand the other person, but you must also express your feelings and ideas clearly. A relationship consists of two people so there must be two voices with a reasonable outcome.
  5. To improve communication in your relationship there must be openness on both sides. You can do this by sharing your experiences, the good and the bad. This will help both people relate on each other.
  6. When a discussion arises, avoid comments that will harm the other person. This includes generalizations and contempt. If you don't do this, you'll later feel sorry for what you said. It is also important that both exalt self-confidence and self-esteem.
  7. Find something good despite the negative. Let your partner have their own space by avoiding being a controller and insisting that they are always right.

If you can apply some of these ideas you may be able to avoid communication problems with your partner. It's amazing how small things we can do improve listening make a big difference when it comes to noticing something good in the other person.

Friendship In A Digital Age

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This internet allows us to make connections from around the world, it gives us the opportunity to have communication with many people from different walks of life, even if they are thousands of miles away. The only options for such contact just a few decades ago were via mail (slow) and long distance telephone calls (expensive).

Today I can met people, characters (yes, you read that correctly) "characters" because they play a role, I don't know them personally, or if they really are who they say they are. At best, they show a part of their personality in which they hope shows the best part of their character without realizing it, well, that is now always true, but that's another story that I hope to tell you later.

Their is some truth to the argument that they are doing the same in their personal life, but that is a subject for another day as well.

I met a special person last year, from the first day we spoke it was as if we knew each other all our lives, it was as if we just stopped talking for a while and our reunion was wonderful. In other words we connected really well. Needless to say we got carried away by everything and had some very happy moments together thanks to this wonderful thing that we call technology.

When we say love we often reserve it for romantic relationships but it is more than that. To love some one does not mean you desire physical intimacy. We felt so much love since that first meeting which came from our hearts. Still, long heartfelt conversations sometimes need to be punctuated with a hug. So we meet. We gave eachother that longed-for embrace and felt each others warmth, I will never forget that. At this point it is important to note that we really don't live that far from one another. A couples of hours drive. The distance was not immense, but that is relative, thanks to the internet we were able to connect, something that would have been impossible otherwise.

The internet brings people together.

What Is True Love

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It's not easy to distinguish between lust and true love. Most people have grown up believing in the idea of true love.

Film loves to feature romantic stories in which an attractive girl and boy meet and although they do not know one another at all, they fall in love with one another instantly, knowing that they have been made for each other. In the scope of a movie this might be necessary given that they run only two hours. But is that realistic? If so film romances strike faster than lightning! While they show this relationship as love, is this true love?

Let's face it, if you don't get to know somebody then you cannot love them. Sure you can get a crush. A whim starts quickly. Maybe, a boy may be attracted to a girl who smiles kindly at him. He might be the only one that feels something, but she may understand his attraction and respond. The idea of being attractive to another person ignites a certain amount of excitement. When it is fresh and new, everyone wonders, "What's happening to me? I've never felt this way before. I'm probably in love. I think I've finally found the right person for myself."

But has that person really fallen in love with the other person—or have they fallen in love with love! If everything feels like it has fallen into place it might be coming from internally. It takes a greater understanding and connection to safely say: "I'm in love. I think I've finally found the right person for me."

That beautiful feeling of being in love is never a permanent condition without something deeper coming from both partners. Without mutual understanding it's a feeling and feelings come and go. You may be on cloud nine with this beautiful feeling, but if you expect to find it so easily can you expect to hold on to it as easily? Can you accept that you have found it and not become board with it? To think that you will live the rest of your life at that top you will be setting yourself up for a great disappointment.

True love, is more than a beautiful feeling—it's a commitment. A commitment is a decision backed by actions.

Many love relationships develop into solid partnerships, especially when emotional communication proves to be stable and sustainable outside the sexual aspect of a relationship. In a love affair in which no partnership is sought or expected, or which is conducted in parallel with an existing partnership, one speaks of a love affair, a liaison, an extramarital sexual relationship in which sex is paramount. In all these cases can one really speak of true love?

Love is the search for a partner one can trust and share a life, this is why people marry. In true love they are sure in each other's love, despite the presence or absence of romantic feelings at that current moment.

Lust itself is a form of selfish love. First and foremost it is a love generated by what the other person can do for him or her at that point. That form of love always seeks convenience and well-being, not that of the other person's wellbeing. It's selfish and one sided. It's erotic at its heart, that's why it's called Eros after the Greek god who ruled over "Lust, Sex, Eroticism and Sensual Desires" . The person who only has that kind of love uses the other person and does not care about the welfare or the relationship. They live according to their feelings and not according to a commitment.

The opposite of Eros, Agape is a Greco-Christian term referring to love, "the highest form of love, charity," which can be seen as a form of true love. It is a constant love. The partner always wants the best for the other person.

This kind of love is true love. Don't settle for selfish love, a love that only thinks of itself. Seek true love, love Agape, the love it gives, and gives, and continues to give. Seek God first to experience that love and you will never again settle for selfish love or be a person you selfishly love. It's really worth it.

Love gives, it does not take.

Intimacy Comes From Within

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Many couples feel dissatisfied with their relationship on a sexual level and blame their partner; unable to think that there may be other reasons why they don't enjoy sex.

Today, it has become increasingly common to use copulation as a way to express other feelings, or as a way to solve other situations that have nothing to do with intercourse itself. Thus, the erotic relationship becomes a loaded experience, one with a lot of feelings; yet one stripped of its true and subsequent strength, which at the same time inevitably causes dissatisfaction, frustrations, and a sense of lacking.

Research into sexual health has brought forth example that spontaneity to become affectionate and show affection does not often exist between such couples. Thus, many people confuse making love their partner as the only way to expression in how they feel about each other. When this happens, needs are confused, and intimate moments lose passion and are no longer pleasant. Men are more prone to bundling sex together with the expression of love than do women. Today this is less acceptable, what was once one of the only culturally acceptable ways for a man to show affection to his wife is now a limitation.

It is true that sex can be a way of expressing affection, but it is also true that sex must be primarily pleasant for both parties and it is important that there are also other ways of giving and receiving affection that should not disappear in the couple's relationship. To avoid this confusion, it is important that they are clear about their emotional needs on the one hand, and on the other the sexual needs which are present in all healthy couples, without the former diminishing the latter.

So it's important to make it clear that it would be nice to kiss every night before bed, or a hug during the day. Hugging is important because it releases increase levels of oxytocin and reduces blood pressure. There is little question why it is universal in human communities. It is also recommended that the couple take at least 10 minutes every night to be nearby each other and cuddle with their partner without erotic intentions. Cuddle will fill the sentimental desire so that sexual desire can be enjoyed more broadly.

Another wrong reason why many couples make love with one another is to make peace in the household (makeup sex), to be distracted with something else, to combat stress, or compensate for the problems of everyday life. This situation causes a serious problem for many couples, because the person who uses it, that flees into sex, will get used to not facing life and hide in their moments of passion, so that they will soon stop being able to enjoy the moment, and in addition, the other person will never learn to support their partner if it is not a topic easily address which will prevent them from communicating and end up relating sex to help, which completely undermines its potential.

In order to resolve stressful situations in the home it is necessary to learn to open a dialog and to comment sincerely on one's feelings. It is also essential to say what is expected of sex, the needs that are present in the relationship and the gaps in other areas which are not replaced with sexual contact. Likewise, the couple must understand that the pleasure of both is important.

Likewise, some people will evade sex and avoid emotional interaction with their partner, always seeking intimate contact. Instead of talking about their problems they may want to have sex. In this circumstance, what needs to be made clear is that sex is not a substitute for emotions. It complements them and is undeniable that it brings the couple closer, but you must have communication at all levels for it to function, a relationship must include all aspects to be satisfying both erotically and emotionally.

Another common issue in an unhealthy relationship is that some people vent all their frustrations and anger in the sexual act. This is not healthy because you can hurt the couple in a very aggressive outburst, or you can stop enjoying sex, because it always reminds us of the problems of daily life. Alternate to this it might also become enjoyable which is a sign of deeper issues. To avoid all this, we must have true and sincere communication with our partner and also know how to discern when we are not in optimal condition to make love.

In those moments, an intimate conversation or hug may be more effective for the couple.

Anyway, as you can see, it's easier for a sexual relationship to deteriorate by the emotional burden of sex that is added over time, rather than time itself. When the couple manages to get rid of all those non-intimate reasons, they will immediately enjoy the experience more and will be able to experience new horizons.